I can see the sun again

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And to you i say. . .

Good day Winter wind,

As i am embraced –skin to skin–

Uncaringly reminded of the hard stalactites

I enclose within.

In your fury, in your gale,

Among Summer's dead leaves,

The prideful immortality of sunlight Is torn away

Carried off in your tail.

Only one buss has passed,

Still i live less and less,

Solely now in her absence

Awareness of Life's tenderness.

In the infinate contrast,

Between you and i,

More certain than ever,

I am truly alive.

mimiq entry!

woah woah

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Origins

This whole section will be written in Mimiq, the conlang script I created over the course of two weeks while mostly bedridden due to a lung infection. This might explain the general state of delirium I was in at the time. Regardless, I was in a position of great boredom with vast amounts of free time. I have, on occasion, tried to journal in Mimiq, as there is something deeply personal about writing my thoughts down in a way that mostly only I can read back. Mimiq lends me a great feeling of privacy while simultaneously helping me ease up and write with less hesitation than I usually would.

To me, Mimiq is nothing more than a crutch. As much as I would like to pretend I do not know why I like using it, I do. It all comes down to my fear of being observed, or more accurately, what assumptions might follow as a result of someone truly observing me. That all becomes ironic when I realize the only thing stopping someone from getting a clear, naked view into exactly what I am writing would be simply copying the text and pasting it elsewhere. But I digress. As long as it helps me write, I believe I will continue until I stop being terrified of falling under the eyes of others, unless I decide how, where, and when they see me.

Voyeur

I am to remind myself, you bear the fruits only of the seeds you sow.
and what about you, the person reading this? does the thought of reading something meant to be hidden excite you? is there some primal voyeuristic pleasures to be had in seeing something that was never meant for you? but if you are here, and you do read this i implore you to listen as i try to make myself not only listen and watch, but to act. i leave us both with this.

you bear the fruits
you bear the fruits
you bear the fruits